Choosing to act and to change doesn’t come out of thin air. Choosing to act usually comes after spending a protracted amount of time in a place of pain.
We humans have an amazing propensity for avoidance. We want things to stay the way they are and we’ll put up with difficult and self-destructive life circumstances just because they are what we know. Contemplating a change, even if it would be best for us, puts us into scary, unknown territory. Taking the first steps into action usually occurs only when the fear of change becomes less than the desire to keep things the way they are.
For several weeks, I’ve been blogging in “journal form” replicating the process I went through as I was contemplating change and taking action. These changes have led me to a wonderful life in sobriety but it took me a painfully long and protracted amount of time to finally take that action. Every major change I’ve made in my life has generally followed this cycle: an awareness of uncomfortable feelings; awakening to the realization that I need to pay attention; discovering that change is possible even though I’m afraid; finding the courage to just think about it and to sit with the discomfort; and then to take the first of many action steps toward that change.
I would never have been able to do any of this without help – without a support system of people that provided me with wake up calls, pep talks, hard-to-hear words, ears and hearts willing to listen and big pats on my back for many accomplishments along the way. People who understood, didn’t judge and allowed me to find my way on my own terms. People I met along the way and never saw again but whose words inspired me, shook me to my core and impacted me for the better. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
If you’re ready to take some action and need a little help, just ask!
“Do not wait until regrets are your only option, make the changes and act before it’s too late.”
― RJ Intindola – (Gandolfo) – 2000